Buried

Papers.

They're everywhere.

Everywhere I go, everywhere I look, shoved in every nook and cranny, there they are:

Papers.

School papers, work papers, news papers, magazines, catalogs, old bills, new bills, junk mail, papers to be signed, papers to be filed, papers to be un-filed, papers to be tossed, er, recycled, papers to be shredded, papers in the "to be dealt with later" pile (compounding my problems)...

Papers.

I thought I could handle 'em. Get 'em under control. Streamline the process. Thin out the file cabinets, the junk drawers. GIVE US MORE SPACE! But they're like frickin' rabbits, multiplying by the hundreds, the thousands. I shred one (paper, not rabbit), but ten more appear. I roll a heaping recycling container out to the curb, with piles and piles and piles of PAPERS still waiting for their turn in the wings, mocking me! Their numbers stretch to the sky, waving precariously in the wind! THEY'RE FALLING! I have nowhere to run and am consumed by the downward rush of PAPERS! Is there no one who can help me? IS THERE NO ONE TO HEAR MY AGONIZING PLEAS FOR MERCY? OH, FOR THE LOVE OF...

Honey? HONEY!

Hmm? Huh? What the...

Wake up...you were having a nightmare.

I was?

You kept mumbling "papers" and kicking me in the shins. I'm going to have bruises!

Oh. Sorry Hon.

Maybe you oughtta take a break from your reorganization project. You know, fall back and regroup?

But I've got 'em right where I want 'em!

Yeah, right. Go back to sleep. And if you kick me again, you'll be riding the couch! Stupid papers.

So Close

The end is in sight, and I'm not just talking about Christmas. I redeemed myself this week by recommitting myself fully to the patio project. And I have proof! Diane came out with the camera as we were putting the finishing touches on the mortar.



Look at the concentration. We're completely focused on the job. Like Operation, "It takes a ve-ry steady ha-and."



Diane just wanted to get a shot of my arse...my better side. I almost said "half".



Alright, alright...can't you see we're busy? Hurry up and take the freakin' picture.



The nearly finished product. We're going to cap the ends with a brick border and we'll officially be done. Then it'll be on to the next project. But that will be next year.

'Tisn't the Season...

...to lay flagstone.

Fa la la la laaa

La la la laaaa.

Unless you are my father-in-la-aw

Fa la la la laaa

La la la laaa.

I've been dealing with a self-imposed guilt trip this past week as I have largely abandoned my father-in-law on the patio project. My only consolation has been the fact that I at least helped him put down all of the large pieces, so I don't have to worry about him crushing a body part or throwing out his back. It's just that, with Christmas just around the corner, I've had to give my attention to other things. I did help him on Monday, but he flew solo for the rest of the week, God bless him. I've had good reasons for my abandonment, and this is my attempt to cleanse my conscience whilst my dear ol' dad-in-law slaved away in mine own back yard.

Tuesday, I was gone. There can't be a better excuse than that. And it gets better. I was accompanying Kailey on her field trip, so not only was I spending quality time with my daughter, but was also performing my civic duty and providing quality care for your children as they expanded their educational horizons.

Wednesday morning, Diane and I took Kyra to the doctor. Another fantastic excuse as I was looking after my youngest daughter's well-being. Before that, though, I had a haircut appointment which, in my mind, is another good excuse for bailing because who wants to get all of those Holiday photos taken with a shaggy head, right? After returning from Kyra's doctor's appointment, Diane reminded me that Wednesday was now or never for getting the Christmas lights up on the house. Now I love having the house lit up with Christmas lights, but I loathe hanging them. Fortunately I did all the really hard work three years ago when I installed hooks under the eaves of the roof. And I was actually considering adding another layer of lights this year, which meant another layer of hooks. I quickly came to my senses and put the kibosh on that idea and reverted to the normal light set up.

Thursday morning was my final class for the semester (whoo hoo!), and then it was off to work (doh!). And I spent all of Friday morning paying bills and making sure we had the money to buy all this Christmas cr...stuff. I figured it would be also be prudent to pay the mortgage and keep the home we're (or he's) working so hard on from going into foreclosure.

We're making progress and I should be able to lend more of a hand next week. The flagstone is all in place, and now the long and laborious project of mortaring begins. Here's the "before" pic:



The "laying the foundation" pic:



And here's where we stand now:



Quite the difference, huh? Thanks Papa!

Pass the Pain Killers. Stat.

Pain. Intense, excruciating pain. Arthritic fingers won't glide across keyboard. Hand curved in permanent G.I. Joe "kung fu" grip. Typing with right index finger. Occasional help from thumb.

Had "bright" idea yesterday. Deviate from original patio plan. Be creative! "Extend" one side of extended patio. More digging. More mixing. More hauling sand, dirt in wheel barrow. Will look "cool".

Today. May have overdone it. Digging. Lots of digging. Hauling lots of dirt. Big hole. Found irrigation lines. Again. Crap. More digging and rerouting lines. Dug some more.

Fill big hole with cement. Mixing. Lots of mixing. Sand, cement, water. Mix, pour, repeat. Stopped counting at 20. Can't feel arms. Lower back killing me. Legs? J-E-L-L-O.

Took ibuprofen. 6 or 7. Not working. Need more "kick". Percoset? Vicodin? OxyContin? Screw it. Going directly to morphine.

Patio? Looks frickin' cool.