Holy Javelinas!!

I looked at my ringing cell phone and saw that Diane was calling. Being the good husband that I am and seeing that I had nothing to hide, I answered my wife's call. We started our conversation with the usual chit-chat, "How was your day," "How were the girls for you tonight," etc, when Diane decided to tell me a story.

"Tonight I did something YOU would do," she began. "I don't know what I was thinking...It was so...STUPID."

It took a moment for me to realize that my wife, the love of my life and the woman of my dreams, just referred to me as "stupid". Actually, she referred to my actions as "stupid", which is true because many of the things I do are admittedly "stupid", but I don't really need my wife to remind me of that. What I need from my wife is the reminder that she loves me IN SPITE of the stupid things I do.

"HEY," I objected, but she just laughed it off and continued with her story.

Rewind a couple of hours to another cell phone conversation I had. This one was with Kailey. I answered the phone to her animated voice, "DAD, WE JUST SAW A JAVELINA (hah-vuh-lee-nuh)...ON OUR STREET!" We live in a residential area on the outskirts of Tucson that is surrounded by desert. It is not unusual to see coyotes roaming around neighborhoods at night. But I've never seen a javelina roaming around in the neighborhood, which would be very exciting. Diane was driving the girls to softball practice when Kailey saw the javelina in a neighbor's yard roughly six houses down from ours. Diane didn't see it, and on Kailey's request, turned the van around to have a look and verified that there was, indeed, a javelina in the neighbor's yard. The girls flipped. out.

Fast-forward to the current conversation of the alleged dad-like "stupid" thing done by my wonderfully supportive wife. As they were coming home from softball practice and pulling in the driveway, Diane told the girls, "Papa kept the garage door up when we left for softball practice. I hope no javelinas got in there." The girls flipped. out. Kyra was bawling at the top of her lungs and wouldn't get out of the van because she was convinced that she saw a javelina lurking in the dark corner of the garage. The girls spent the rest of the evening screaming and freaking out at every little noise and inspecting under chairs and beds (like a frickin' javelina could fit under the bed) to make sure they wouldn't be mauled in their sleep. It turned out to be an exhausting night of bed-prep for Diane, and all because of a little comment.

As she finished telling me the tale of her borrowed "stupidity", I was no longer hurt or offended. In fact, I could feel that hurt turning into something like pride because this was something I would TOTALLY do. And finally, after sixteen years of marriage, I could see my wife, the love of my life and the woman of my dreams, FINALLY taking on some of MY characteristics. May God have mercy on our children.