Just a Case of Pre-Concert Jitters

The past month has been all-Hannah, all the time. Hannah Montana for Halloween, Hannah Montana in concert, and now Hannah Montana...the birthday party. Kyra turns 7 this weekend, and yes, she has chosen Hannah Montana as the theme for her party, which we'll be having at the house, complete with a guitar piñata (I just want you to know...it took me at least ten frickin' minutes to figure out how to put that frickin' tilde over that frickin' "n"). Let me just say that in this season of thanks, I will be thankful to give Hannah Montana a rest for a good, long time.

A few weeks back Kyra decided that for her birthday party she would like to perform a Hannah Montana song. And she wanted me to accompany her on guitar. Does it sound to you like I have an ambitious Miley Cyrus-like performer in the making? Hey, if she can make us some Miley-like money, I say go for it! I'll even pay for the future therapy! After a thorough review of Miley's latest CD, Kyra selected I Miss You, a song about losing a loved one. And she wanted to dedicate it to her great grandpa who passed away just before Christmas last year. I love it when her sweet side shines through.

So I had a song to learn. I went online to try to find lyrics and a chord chart for the song. The chord charts I found were complete crap and I sometimes wonder if the doofuses uploading them are listening to the same song. Like the saying goes, if you want something done right, you gotta do it yourself. So I did. Since then I've listened to the song a million times just to get the tune down and to practice with Kyra.

Tonight we practiced without the CD for the first time, and I think Kyra was a little shocked, like walking the tight rope without the safety net. We ran through it a couple of times and when we were done, Kyra looked depressed. "My voice doesn't sound right," she pouted.

I laughed. "Yeah, your voice sounds a little different when Miley's not singing along, huh?"

"It sounds all...scratchy."

In reality, it sounded fine...like a soon-to-be 7 year-old singing a Miley Cyrus song. I think she's just getting a little anxious about her performance and I'm beginning to see signs of perfectionism sprouting in my youngest daughter. Hmmm...I wonder where she gets that from.

Post Concert Wrap Up

Concert posters were made, paraphernalia was purchased in mass quantities, hearing was lost, voices were screamed and sung hoarse, and a good time was had by all at the Jonas Brothers/Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus concert at Jobing.com arena in Glendale. I knew the girls would love it, but was genuinely surprised when Diane reported that it was a really good concert. Who knew? A pictorial review:



Hannah did indeed rock. Both of the girls made posters to display during the concert. I forgot to ask them if they were able to take them into the arena.



As official Hannah Montana fan club members, Kailey & Kyra had an opportunity to win raffle tickets for an official tour of Miley's party bus. They arrived too late to participate.



The Jonas Brothers were the opening act. I didn't hear too much about these guys...



...but this is a shot of Kailey during their set. Look at her eyes, all glossed over and dreamy-looking. I was surprised she didn't come home with a Jonas Brothers poster for the wall of her room. She did, however, choose the hot pink Jonas Brothers T-shirt over Hannah Montana.

The girls called me at work during the intermission, and they were hyped. It made me sad to miss that experience with them. Kailey kept going on about how loud it was in the arena. "The Jonas Brothers came out, and all the girls were screaming at the top of their lungs," she gushed. "I had to cover my ears!" OK, now I was less sad to miss the experience of ten thousand girls screaming at the top of their lungs.

"I could feel my heart beating in my chest!" Kyra reported, trying to explain the feeling of bass pulses reverberating inside her chest. I laughed, knowing exactly what she was talking about, and then felt sad again.



(Revision: I thought I'd better add a little more about The Jonas Brothers since I've been receiving about a million hits from a JB fan site. I polled the girls and they said that the Jonas Brothers were "awesome". Cool? Oh, and here's another JB pic for your enjoyment.)



Hannah/Miley's stage set up.



Miley did a couple of different sets, first as Hannah Montana followed by a set as herself. After all, she's going to need to establish her own identity as an artist. She can't be Hannah Montana when she's 30. Right?



She also had about 350 costume changes, because you just simply can't wear the same outfit for two hours.



Kyra singing along and having the time of her life. And who's freaky stalker-looking dude in the background? Mind yer own BEESwax, dude! I'll have to edit him out of the picture.



Here Miley's doing what I think is a solo acoustic set, if I remember the report correctly, which further impressed Diane. The concert wasn't a simply choreographed lip-synch show. Miley is a very talented young lady.



Here the girls are pulling Grammy away from the Beer, Wine & Spirits stand...again! Kidding. I just think this is a hilarious backdrop for a "family" photo.



They spent the night in Chandler and finished off their trip with, what else, a little shopping! They made it home safe and sound Saturday night, and I'm glad to have them back. By the way, I had the house to myself on Friday night and didn't do ONE load of laundry.

A $50 Toy Vs. a 70¢ Balloon

The balloon will win out every single stinkin', frickin' time. Diane gave me a task to fulfill on my way home from work for Kailey's birthday party on Wednesday: pick up some balloons. I stopped by a party store where they had a whole wall-full of balloons to choose from. It was a little overwhelming. I stood there staring at the wall for about ten minutes before someone came over and asked a really stupid question, "Do you need some balloons?" No, I'm making a mental sketch of every freakin' balloon on your wall so I can go home and construct exact duplicates in an attempt to avoid paying the exorbitant prices you people charge for a mylar balloon. Did I say that? No. I simply responded, "Yes, please."

"Are you having your party within the next eight hours?" she asked. I shot her a puzzled look. "The regular balloons only last eight hours after being inflated," she explained. Allll-righty then. I assured her that we would be partying as soon as I got home, roughly twenty minutes after she fulfilled my order. Satisfied, she scooted behind the counter and began rounding up balloons.

I bit the bullet and bought one of their $13 mylar balloons, an enormous heart-shaped "Happy Birthday" balloon that had four smaller stars branching off of it, along with a dozen regular ones of varying colors. The balloon lady filled them up while I settled the bill, and I went on my less-than-merry way. These party people are running a racket, and they know it. They also know that I'll be back to pay their ridiculous prices because they understand that the look on my child's face once she sees their balloons will make my suddenly lighter wallet worth while. And they're right. Kailey was ecstatic when she saw me walk through the door with my posse of balloons in tow.

We tied the balloons to her chair and proceeded with the birthday festivities: lunch, cake, and presents. Presents. The kid made a quite a haul in that department: dolls, art stuff, outdoor play gear, electronic gadget toys...enough stuff to keep her busy for a month. They did keep her busy for the day. But on Thursday, one guess as to what captivated her attention. Balloons.

True to the balloon lady's prediction, the regular ones wilted overnight. The girls cut the strings off of them and proceeded to bump and kick and swat them all over the house...for hours. It was maddening. What was worse is that they then had the audacity to argue over one balloon. And of course all of this happened while I tried to take a nap (I'm not lazy...I worked the early morning shift and had been up since 3:30). "THERE'S TWELVE BALLOONS AND I'LL BREAK EVERY LAST ONE OF THEM IF YOU CAN'T STOP FIGHTING OVER THE PEARLED BLUE ONE!!!" I threatened. They normally ignore my idle threats, but I must have sounded really angry because they relented...for about twenty minutes. Then, like a dog returns to its vomit, they returned to their folly. It's been a long couple of days.

The good thing about balloons is that they don't last long. By tomorrow they will have deflated enough that they'll need to be thrown away. Hopefully, Kailey will then return to play with the gifts we bought with our hard-earned money. If she doesn't they'll sit in her closet and collect dust with all of her other forgotten toys only to be remembered several years from now when we try to give them away to Goodwill or The Salvation Army. Then Kailey will petition and plead like mad to keep them. The headaches will begin all over again, all because of a 70 cent balloon.